When the Passion Play was read in the Old Lady’s church this year, she was offered a choice of parts… and she chose Judas, since it is sometimes hard to get someone to play that part because they are wary of identifying with the betrayer. But somebody has to be Judas, after all; if there had not been a Judas to betray Jesus, there would not have been a Passion and all that it brings with it to the world. Judas is not representative of evil; even Jesus knew somebody had to do it and said to Judas, “Friend, do what you came to do.”
Cut to the night the Old Lady’s dear Mother died. Near the end her suffering was so intense that, even though Mother had consistently refused any pain meds, the Old Lady was so distressed that she tried to sneak a little liquid morphine from a dropper into Mother’s mouth just to ratchet things down a bit. Mother clamped her little lips closed and shook her head. The Old Lady felt ashamed that she had tried to violate her Mother’s resolve, and suffered guilt.
Then months later, during the Palm Sunday reading of the Passion Play, the Narrator got to the part where the soldiers “… offered Him drugged wine, but He would not drink it.”
The Old Lady had come to understand that her Mother chose to accept her suffering at the end of life in emulation of Jesus, whom Mother had striven always to follow. And now, months afterward, the Old Lady came to understand that to make the symbolic action complete somebody had to offer Mother the drug so that she could refuse it… just as Jesus had done.
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That somebody had to be the Old Lady. She played her part in her Mother’s Passion Play.
That’s why she doesn’t mind playing Judas.
Somebody has to do it.